Atleast I can do...

I haven't lost any weight in a month.  :( But I can run 3 to 4 miles, without dying!


Except after 2 days of Disneyland...then I want to die after running this:



But I looked at the beach for 2 miles, and that's ok!

My Body is a Temple

As members of the LDS church, I grew up always being told that phrase, "My body is a temple." I always understood the basis behind the words. Treat your body with respect. Only put healthy things into it. Don't defile your body in anyway. Our Heavenly Father gave us this body, a pure creation from him, and just like a temple, we should take care of it as such. But for some reason, I always only thought of the physical aspects my body encounters. Food, exercise, abstaining from harmful drugs, etc.. I never really considered things that would be mentally harmful to me, and yet looking back at when I was my heaviest, it was at times when I was under true mental stress. I've been watching a documentary entitled, "Killer at Large: Why Obesity is America's Greatest Threat." I watch these kinds of shows as I work out to scare the fat off of me. It works. I yell at the computer screen and kickbox a little hard as I watch. In the movie they discussed a study that was done concerning stress and weight gain. In the early days of man, if the body of a hunter or gatherer experienced stress, it was most likely due to not being able to obtain food. These people had to work very hard for their food, and so if they weren't able to obtain it, the body would go into a stressed state and turn on its own survival mode. While in the survival mode, the body's metabolism slowed down, and fat burned more slowly, allowing the body to save its energy due to the lack of food. But now in this day and age, the factors that cause stress to our bodies isn't usually about lack of food. Stress is now caused by other factors such as over-powering bad news on the tv, or money issues, or traffic, or family members. And, just like the cave man, when our bodies become stressed, they go into survival mode, and our bodies stop burning the amount of fat as before. But what do we do? We keep eating. And not just good stuff. What do I crave when I'm stressed? A quarter-pounder with cheese, fries and large sweet tea.
About a week ago, I found myself in a very stressful, very confrontation situation. It has taken me close to a full week to recover from it. During that week, my energy was low, my desire to eat properly diminished, and my will power to exercise was near non-existent. My body shut down. I wasn't sad and moping all over the house in my pjs for a week. I got up every morning with the intention to do my workouts and eat good food. I was able to speak with good friends that could help to uplift me. I still managed to get other obligations done and did them with joy in my heart. But that stressful moment had a negative impact on my body and I could feel it.
It wasn't until today, however, that I really thought about what was happening to my body. I have seen the Lord send blessings my way this week, especially through supportive friends, to help me cope with my stress. Today, however, he sent a lightening bolt of a blessing my way. I was sitting down at the kitchen table preparing our family home evening lesson. I decided that Byron and I would talk to Wyatt about respecting our bodies through nutrition and exercise, since its been something we've really been focusing on, and I don't really remember learning much about it as a child. We now live in a time where our children's generation is not expected to have the same life expectancy as our own, it is to be less than our own, and I'm hoping I can prepare Wyatt to defy that statistic. I sat at the table cutting out these cute little pictures. Some pictures were of bad things such as cigarettes and alcohol that were to be glued on a trash can. And others were good things like healthy foods and exercise that were to be glued on these cute little kids. Then I saw a picture that stopped me in my tracks. "Kind words." I looked at it and pondered the statement, "I can treat my body as a temple by saying kind words." And then I said to myself, "I can treat my body as a temple by hearing kind words." All this time, I tried to be around people who were positive and happy, just because it made me feel good. But I realized today, that by being around people who make negative statements, who treat others poorly, who criticize me, and who cause me stress are preventing me from treating my body as a temple. Is it their job to change what they say just for my benefit? No. But it is my job to create an atmosphere for myself and my husband and child that is positive and full of kind words. It is my job to say kind words to everyone around me. Negative statements were doing more than just making me sad, they were hurting my body, my temple.

I urge you to take care of your temple. Eat good food, go exercise, and say kind words. And try to surround yourself with kind words! It is your right to protect your temple!

Why am I finding it hard to actually follow through with a reward, a promise, that I made to myself. I'm actually second guessing my Dinsey Annual Passes. What is wrong with me?

Your Work's Not Done Yet!

No more whining. No more excuses. You reached your really big goal, but you're not done yet. Byron's back in town, can't use that as an excuse anymore. You ate like crap last week, time to do better. Put the chocolate and tortilla chips away, and go do your cardio workout. Your work's not done yet! :P

100 WORKOUTS!

I did it! I celebrated my 100th workout today by jogging (and a little walking, shhh!) 3 miles today! I knew it was going to be a great day when I weighed myself and saw that I had lost another pound. 22 pounds total! I decided this workout needed to be bigger than the rest. Something that would push me just a bit more than usual. I have had a 3 mile running route in mind, but never had the time or the guts to try it. Today was the day. When I run, I either have one dog with me, or two, or a stroller with a kid, or all three. It felt weird, but today, I had none of them. Duke was limping from swimming yesterday, Da Vinci is just an old fart, and Wyatt was sleeping. I also needed to do this run for just myself. There's always an excuse behind my other runs. "The dogs need exercise...Wyatt gets to feed the chipmunks at the park...we need to get out of the house." But this was just for me. And to be honest, I didn't like it. It was a foreign feeling. Those dogs and that great kid of mine are always with me...and I like it that way. If I'm going to be alone, I'd rather be getting a pedicure.

Though my Disneyland goal got tweaked a bit, my other rewards have stayed the same. Looks like I've earned a new dress and just a couple pounds from calling a photographer!

My work is still not done yet. Deep down, I've still hung on to the goal of losing 30 pounds, and since I'm only 8 pounds away, I want to keep trying. And I'm actually thinking about buying the "Insanity" workout to get me there. Heaven help me. The infomercials makes me want to cry. But its time to push on to the next goal and try something new!

Men's Workouts are From Mars, Women's Workouts are from Venus

I am getting very close to my 100 workouts goal and I'm very excited. When I get very excited about something, I talk about it...a lot. So Disneyland has been the topic of discussion lately. When should I go? Show I try to go next week? Should we just wait? Blah Blah Blah! A basic conversation with Byron goes like this:

Me: I'm thinking about going to Disneyland in the next little bit.
Byron: You could do that.
Me: But I'm not quite to my goal of 100 workouts yet. But if I pushed and did 3 to 4 workouts a day I could make it.
Byron: (chuckle chuckle)
Me: What was that? Why are you laughing?
Byron: Nothing!
Me: Tell me why you're laughing!
Byron: Because to me, a workout is a workout. I go to the gym, and everything I do that day is consider A workout.
Me: So you think if I set a goal of 100 workouts, that should be the same as 100 days? That would take me forever to get to Disneyland.
Byron: I'm not saying that. Go to Disneyland. I just think its weird that you divide up your workouts.

Bleh!!!!! So what do you think? Am I the crazy one? (Nevermind, don't answer that.) But honestly, as a mom, there are really hectic, bad days when all I have for myself is 30 little minutes, and 9 times out of 10, they are spent pushing a kid in a stroller. But I'm still being a mom, doing something that I love, and yet still trying to find time to take care of my body. Why then, should I be penialized for that? Should a 30 minute jog be counted as the same as a 90 minute run/cardio/abs combo?

Ok, ok, I know I'm not supposed to be looking at the scale every day anymore, but I'm in the 130s...barely, 139.5, but still...I was starting to think I would never see myself in the 130s. There's something about seeing that "3." Like I'm that much closer to my goal and I might actually reach it. The ultimate goal is 130.5. I can see it there on the horizon!

Just so I will remember...

Sunday morning, I was actually happy with the way my stomach looked. And my outfit made me look hot, just sayin'. And I did workout #75 this morning. I am 3/4s closer to my goal!

Not much to say, but still progressing!

I haven't been writing much, but I haven't been in a blogging mood with any of my blogs lately, so that's why. It isn't because I haven't been working at my exercise program, 'cause I really really have! Ever since I lightened up on myself and stopped worrying about the weight so much, my life has been a lot happier. I haven't had any bouts with depression and crying because the weight wasn't coming off as fast as I'd like it to. It still isn't coming off as fast, but focusing on working out and getting up to 100 workouts has been a much more positive process, something I can control. And I'm discovering that even though walking for 30 minutes is easier than running for 30 minutes, I still want to run. I want to push myself, because I know I'll see better results. The eating part could be a bit better, but I like to eat good sweet things. I just got back from a great vacation in Parawon, UT with family, and then Seattle with more family. I love KB's food when he grills, so I ate well up there.
And in Seattle, I knew there were going to be some yummy places, especially the Trophy cupcakes with Esther where we taste tested 4 cupcakes. I still lost weight.

I think it was because I knew these "eating moments" were coming, and so I would workout more and stay away from the snack foods that just were fluff and not really taste. I really think about if something is really worth eating before I put it in my mouth. Yesterday, 1/4 of a Rocky Mountain Chocolate Carmel Apple was worth putting in my mouth. But a random average granola bar from Wyatt's snack bin (which I looked at and threw back), then not so much.

So just a little report, as you can see in my weigh-in's column, I have lost 19.5 lbs as of this morning and I have done 67 workout sessions. If I do 2 to 3 workout sessions 6 days a week, which is what I've usually been doing, I'll have my big reward by the end of this month. Disneyland here we come!

Running Sucks!

I fell. I totally fell. I was doing really good. I only had one dog with me, Wyatt was at home with Byron, and there was a 30 minute time limit. I got half-way through my run, Duke by my side, The Killers pumping in my ipod, and then in happened. My very expensive, very well made $12 Target tennis shoes :P caught the edge of the sidewalk, and sent me flying forwards. The sidewalk of the Pueblo Park was designed by Satan himself. It is covered in razor sharp gravel that devours skin and leaves hamburger. Because of my speed, once my left knee hit the sidewalk, the momentum continued to push my knee across the pavement like cheese on a cheese grater. Yummy. Contrary to what my husband claims, I was not running like this:


But my knee does look like this:

and my thigh feels like its been jammed up into my hip, which means I need a chiropractor, stat! Fun times, fun times.

OK, so here's the new plan...

I've changed my way of thinking about this weight-loss thing. And before I explain it, I want you to know that I'm not totally ok with the change. I feel as though I am giving up a little, or cheating, and there is some guilt that is coming with that. But the original plans of losing 30 pounds was making me crazy. One mistake, and I was depressed and crying. I would punish myself and loathe myself if I ate tortilla chips. Side note: I'm pretty sure there is a hormonal issue here, and problems with dealing with failure, blah blah blah. One problem at a time. I wish I could say that I have had an awakening and have discovered a love of my body and who I am right now. Well, I'm here to tell you that is a load of crap. Bottom line is, I can no longer allow myself to be consumed with the thought of losing 30 pounds, losing 30 pounds, losing 30 pounds! Its driving me nuts, because you know what, I may never fully lose those 30 pounds. But I'm excercising everyday. Not just 20 minutes. But good hard working excersise for more than an hour. And I'm doing it in or near my home, and either with my child playing near me, riding his bike along with me, or sleeping soundly in the care of my husband. There are times that my hour workout takes me an hour and a half, because I need to give a good morning hug, or make breakfast, or help get the legos down. But if I need to be a good mom that is not 30 pounds less, then so be it. I surrender. I'd rather be chubby and with my son, then skinny and ignoring him.

OK, my new plan: 100 workout sessions. A session must be 30 minutes or more. A session can be running, walking, cardio, weights, swimming (not constantly though, 2 laps and I about died.). The scale is getting put away. Byron has been told to take it and hide it. I will weigh myself in a month. This may bite me in my big behind. I may weigh myself in a month and discover not a damn thing has changed. I'll deal with that if it comes. It may be in the form of a nervous breakdown, but I'll still deal with it. Once I accomplish 100 workouts, I will be purchasing my season passes for Wyatt and I to Disneyland, where I will go and eat a frozen banana.

I am worried about my diet, though. I haven't been able to find a way to measure or record if I have been eating healthy. And what do I do if I mess up? I'm still trying to work all that out.

So now, I just try to find enjoyment in my workouts, eat all the veggies I can fit onto my plate, and hope that its enough. Because, quite honestly, I have had enough!

Time to Regroup

I read this quote today:

“Last summer I complained to a non-Latter-day Saint friend that I was exhausted, having no fun, living like an automaton. Nonsympathetically, she countered, ‘What do you think this is? A dress rehearsal? This is your life, Carol. Fix it.’ I expected a pat and a kind word. Instead, I got a splash of reality square in the face. She was, of course, quite right. I wasn’t giving my life value, so I didn’t feel it had value. I went home, reread the parables of the sower and of the talents, and regrouped.” (A Singular Life, ed. Carol L. Clark and Blythe Darlyn Thatcher, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1987, pp. 35–36.)

Its time to regroup, create new goals and change old ones. Changes are coming...

I thinking of giving up...seriously.

Vacay Munchies

Why am I constantly hungry when I'm on vacation? After a great day at the Santa Monica Beach, I'm clean and warm from a hot shower, and now all I can think of is chips and salsa and chocolate. I did go jogging along the beach this morning for 30 minutes, so at least I have that going for me.

HALF WAY MARK!!!!!!!!

I have lost 15 1/2 pounds as of this morning! Holy Schmolies! I never thought it would have taken this long, getting old sucks! But I can now see that if I can make it this far, and I can go even farther. I'm concerned about my timeline though. I really don't want to spend another 5 months losing 15 pounds. As much as I don't want to, I'm thinking of really cutting back on my calories, and really paying attention to the calories I'm taking in.

You know, I say all the stuff...but what I'm really thinking of are these...



Go figure!

Dear Lord,

I just served and helped at a funeral for 6 1/2 hours. Please bless me by having me burn 5,000 calories for each hour of my service.

Amen

Errrrr!

I think I'm in a freakin' rut again! Have you noticed I haven't been posting much, or putting my weigh-ins down? Its like I go through these phases where I stop caring and eat 5 cookies. What is wrong with me? Errrrrr!

Wah wah wah wahhhhh.

Didn't make my 15 pound goal today, but in my defense I was out of town and its that time of the month. I'm only 2 pounds away. I'm extending the date to the end of this week. Time to get serious!

If She Can Do This...Then So I Can I!

I Wish I Could...But I Can't

I wish I had the patience to make these...but I don't.
I wish I could just eat them...but I won't.
I'll just look at the picture...and think about what I will be able to do...20 pounds from now.
If you can make and eat these...go here.

Stupid Scale

I am obsessive when it comes to weighing myself on the scale. I do it every morning, on an empty stomach, with as little clothes as possible, just to be accurate. This morning, my scale played a nasty little joke on me. Last night, just for kicks, I stepped on the scale. It read 150 lbs. This morning, I stepped on, and I swear to you, it read 146 lbs!!!!! Sweet Mary and Joseph! I didn't know how it happened, but I was stoked! Then, Pessimist Sommer spoke up in my head and said, "That can't be right. You better check again." I did. All of a sudden, the scale decided to add 2 1/2 pounds! Stupid inner voices! Stupid bathroom scale! Errr!

A New Me!

Whaddya think?

My Ten Pound Reward

Next week, Shellie's gonna make me look like this...

Shellie, you do have a magic wand...right?

Just because its cool...

Music that Moves Me, Literally!

Here's my jogging playlist. Oh how I love it so.

Mamma, wanna lose a pound?

Disclaimer: I was really exciting about writing the following post, but as I sit here, I can feel the too large piece of peanut butter cookie bar topped with peanut butter icing, reese peanut butter chips, and M&M's trying digest in my stomach, and this post just doesn't have the same effect it did on me yesterday. Oh well!

I am super proud of myself this week! Lots of big accomplishments concerning my weight loss have happened. I finally reach my ten pound benchmark. I stood on the scale in amazement. 150.5 lbs it read. Really? Are you sure, little scale? I stepped off, waited, and then stepped on again. 150.5 again. Yesss! I did a little dance in my underwear (sorry, I know TMI) in the middle of my bathroom. Another big moment: I worked out 6 days this week! And trust me, there were moments that I did not want to move out of that bed. Even on the days that I magically did not hear my 4 AM alarm and didn't wake up until 6:30, everything was put on hold until I got that workout in. It so silly that no matter how early I wake up normally, if I sleep in just a little bit, I immediately think there's no time to work out. Well, there is. Stop making excuses and get it done. I was feeling quite content with 5 workouts this week. "I think I'll sleep in Saturday." I said to myself. "I think I'll just lay in bed and let Wyatt watch some cartoons. He'll have a poptart, I'll have some cereal. And maybe we'll walk the dogs." I said. "I'm certainly not going to run, or anything." Then, at 7:15 AM, as I lay in bed, thinking about getting up, there was a voice in my ear. "Mamma, you wanna go workout so you can lose a pound, and then we can go to Disneyland." Hmmmm. How do you say no to a request like that? And so that's what I did. I got up. I turned on Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution on the computer, and my workout tape on the TV. In the meantime, Wyatt got out his army guys, legos, and log cabin pieces to make a fort in the study, while I worked out. Then, after a quick breakfast, we took an adventure through the park for an hour and half. Wyatt rode his big wheel, and the dogs and I had to jog to keep up. It was great! I'm so glad my 4 year old drill sergent was there to keep me going.

During my workout, I was completely in awe with Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution. I am really starting to get interested in the concept of "whole foods" and taking out highly processed food of our diets. Will I ever completely take things out, probably not. And the thought of starting, or looking at organic foods is really intimidating to me. But there is this deep down desire for my family to be healthy and fit, always. During the show, Jamie met with a pastor. The pastor was extremely concerned about his congregation that was basically dying off, all due to health issues caused by diet. In the pastor's sermon, he reminded me of something that the LDS faith has taught me since I was little. "Treat your body like a temple." Duh! I had forgotten that concept. I allowed stress and life to force me to treat my body like a refuge dump, not a temple. There's a blog I like to follow run by some LDS sisters concerning self-reliance. Most of the content deals with food storage and how to use it. But then one day they posted this: Lose 10 lbs in 2 Months.
I made fun of it with my friend Patricia, because these sisters suggested to do this program as an LDS ward or congregation. I said,"I just can't see this being appropriate to do on a ward level!" Patricia mostly agreed, but then she said something that came to my mind while watching the TV show. She said,"Our church leaders have been encouraging self-reliance in all forms. If you are healthy, watching what you eat, losing weight, then you're not paying thousands of dollars in medical bills." She was so right. I don't want my money to go to doctors and insurance companies if I can save my health and my money myself! I've got Disneyland tickets to buy, remember! As I was thinking about these concepts, I thought about the walk, no run, Wyatt and I took this past Saturday morning. Wyatt biked farther than he has ever biked before. We were so proud of each other. He was even proud of the dogs! "Mamma, you did a lot of workout! The dogs got good exercise, huh, Honey?" To which I would reply, "Wyatt you did a lot of exercise! I'm so proud of you!" Wyatt was getting the concept of exercise and health that day, barely at age 4! President Brigham Young taught: “Then let us seek to extend the present life to the uttermost, by observing every law of health, and by properly balancing labor, study, rest, and recreation, and thus prepare for a better life. Let us teach these principles to our children” (Discourses of Brigham Young, sel. John A. Widtsoe [1954], 186). That was probably the biggest milestone this week; to see my son understand this concept so early in life.

So, it was big week for my body, mind, and spirit. I'm looking forward to another week just like it!

HOORAY!

I finally made my ten pound goal! I'm a little behind the schedule I wanted to keep, but I'm coming to terms that I'm not 25 years old anymore and the weight just isn't coming off as fast as it did then! The bottom line is the weight is coming off! I'm going to "celebrate" with a good run this morning and then to make an appointment for a pedicure (very much needed right now) and a new haircut. What do you think I should do? Blonde extensions? ;)

Dear Parawon,

I will be coming to visit you today. My purpose is to go skiing for 2 days and enjoy some physical activity with my family.

Please be advised that it is NOT my goal to over eat at every meal, snack on girl scout cookies, load up on carbs, and drink fat and sugar laden hot chocolate 5 times a day just because I saw a snowflake outside.

Parawon Paralysis will cease and desist. There will be no desires for naps at 11 AM. TV watching will be reserved only after a good long run on the slopes. I will come home weighing the same, if not LESS than when I came.

:P

Better

That's what I've got to do...I've got to do things better. I'm making very little progress and it is frustrating me. So I've got to do just a little bit more. Adding more to my workout, walking longer distances, running for a longer time, eating less, drinking more water. I've got to do better.

The Negative and Positve Effects of a Weekend

I went to Parawon last weekend. In Parawon, all we do is eat and sit. Its called Parawon Paralysis. This is what I ate, and I am not exaggerating:

• 1/2 box thin mint girl scout cookies


• 5 lemonade girl scout cookies


• a piece of steak bigger than my head


• carbs, carb, carbs


• not nearly enough water


• potatoes slathered in butter and sour cream


• 4 chips-ahoy chocolate chip cookies and a full glass of milk, at one time


• banana cream pie


• hot chocolate


• In and Out Animal Fries and a root beer


• Scooby Snacks


• taco salad in a deep fried tortilla shell

Uhg. Well, we all know the negative effect of this binge eating. I gained 2 pounds and felt sluggish and bloated. How can there possibly be a positive side to all of this? Believe it or not, I was so angry at myself for all the crap I ate, it actually motivated me make up for the damage, and maybe a little bit more. My workouts are longer, and so are my jogs. More intense too. And as of this morning as I stood on the scale, its working! Now the 3 opportunities this weekend to eat birthday cake for Wyatt's birthday may cause a whole new set of challenges!

Today's Motivations are the Following:

This playlist:

This conversation:

Me: Wyatt, I'm so sleepy today. I should workout, but I want to go back to bed.

Wyatt: I think you should go do your exercises.

Me: But I'm really tired. I want to go back to bed.

Wyatt: No Mommy! If you go to bed, you'll get a pound.



This vegetable that I am currently munching on:

And this picture:

Well, the kid in the picture. No, nevermind, the Mickey lollipop is kind of motivating me too!

Hey! What better way to get myself out of a chubby rut, than to eat a McDonald's double cheese burger for lunch, THEN finish off your son's happy meal, because heaven forbid you throw away food! Way to get 'em Sommer! :P

Stuck in a Rut!

The past few days might have been productive, but I'm noticing that I'm doing just what I can to barely get by. 10 minutes of cardio with a 20 minute jog, instead of a 30 minute cardio and a 20 minute jog. Eating out 3 to 4 days this week instead of maybe once. Eating a few more carbs during the week instead of waiting for the weekend. 2 to maybe 3 Coca Cola glasses of water, instead of 4 to 6. Chocolate! I've got to step it up! I really need a haircut and I want another pedicure, but I can get to those things until I reach the 10 pound mark. I need to find something to motivate me to lose some more weight, then I'll get excited again and want to work harder to lose more. What to do? What to do? Any suggestions?

Starting Over

I'm done having my little tantrum. Sorry about that. I must have still been a little sick and it was making me emotional. I'm better now and am ready just to start over. So I put in a new weight in my weigh-in section and I'm seeing this as a chance to start over. I've already had my first Coca-Cola glass of water. Byron is trying something new, waking up at 4 AM to go to the gym (YAWN!) and I am waking up with him to get an extra hour of things done, including my own exercise! (We'll see how long that goes!) But, the bottom line is, I'm trying again. As of today, I've lost 6 pounds. 4 more and I get my next set of rewards, another pedicure and a new hairstyle. My next question is, how do I lose those 4 pounds, when I've got this plate of cookies sitting on my counter?

Defeated

How is it that I'm sick for 2 days and I gained half my weight back that I lost? Are you kidding me? I just want to cry. I didn't pig out, at least I don't think I did. I ate a few more things than I normally would have. Is that my life? Is my nutrition going to be such an overwhelming factor for the rest of my life? If I slip slightly for one or two days, will that ruin a month's worth of hard work? I'm tired, I'm sad, and I feel so defeated. I will try my best to watch my eating today, but I'm having a hard time finding the desire to care. And now I'm just pissed off at myself for being such a drama queen!

Blech!

I think I'm getting sick. I was inexplicably tired and slothful at the start of this week, it was that time of the month, and I just wasn't feeling good. And then last night the tickle in the throat came. Lovely. I'm frustrated. My brain is telling me I should be working out (I did jog), but my body isn't even responding. I just found this article telling me to lay off the work out for a bit, so I'm going to take that advice. What's the rule of thumb for eating when your sick? That's a huge problem for me. Because if I'm resting, I like to snack. Or if I'm sick, I like to snack. Or if I'm...well, you get the idea. I like to snack. I guess this week will be one of those "No Progress" kinds of weeks. I'll try to have self-control with the snacking, and just start all over next Monday!

I just made this picture my desktop background to remind me what my reward will be for losing 30 pounds. Maybe that will keep the Valentine's chocolates out of my big mouth!

Worn Out

I used to have new jeans as my 15 pound reward, but my big ol' bum has worn a hole into the seat of one pair of jeans, and my big ol' thighs wore a whole into my other pair of jeans. I'm gonna need those new jeans a little bit sooner than planned.

I Want Judy Garland's Legs

Thank You Ladies!

• to Pat my neighbor, who knows I've been trying to jog in the park, rather than walk. You started cheering me on as I walked by you, and encouraged me to "Get Runnin'!"



• to the absolute stranger in the park, who not only noticed I was jogging, but noticed me schlepping a stroller with a 40 pound, soon to be 4 year old, and 2 large dogs. She yelled, "YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION!" to me as I ran past. Me, an inspiration? Wow.



• to a true inspiration, my neighbor Terri, a freakin' TRI-ATHLETE, for crying out loud, who made me feel awesome for running my pathetic 20 little minutes, and reassured me I can walk every 1 minute for every 3 minutes I run. Thank the Lord above!



• and though this one might not seem fitness related, to my friend Kristi, who felt impressed to send a little message telling me I was "cute and adorable." Those words just lightened my steps a bit, so that I can keep on going!

I'm feeling blessed today because of you, ladies!

Red Glitter Toes

I worked for a month to lose 5 pounds, just so I get could my reward, a blessed pedicure. I sacrificed carbs, jogged until my cheeks were tomato red, and drank water until I thought might float away. The day finally came. I went to my local Korean sweatshop...oops, I mean, my local nail salon, and had a lovely quiet hour to myself. A man did my feet, which made me uncomfortable at first, but then he started a reflexology massage on my feet and calves. Any awkwardness went right out the window as I closed my eyes and tried not to make inappropriate noises. It was the most lovely experience! I chose blingy red glitter nail polish! In the sun it looked like I had rubies on my toes. Then, within an hour of getting home, Wyatt stepped on my big left toe, and I now have a rough impression of his Vans imitations in my red glitter paint. Maybe a small thing, and yet, I want to cry. Or maybe I want to cry because I'm so hungry. I have decided yet.

I AM SOOOOO COUNTING THIS!

At exactly 5:57 AM, standing in only my underwear (sorry), I stepped on the scale and read the number 155! Yes I realize most of it was the loss of water weight from eating all those dang tortilla chips this past weekend, but I don't care. Could it be a malfunction of my scale? I don't care! I'm counting it and I'm getting a pedicure! So there! :P

Three Random Things...

Its driving me nuts that I am putting these items into one big post, because I am obsessive/compulsive, and feel they need their own separate posts, but I have laundry to put away and chicken in a crock pot that is rotting on the counter as we speak. Time is of the essence. So here we go...

1. I go though phases of what works for me. At one point, the only way I could drink 64 ounces of water each day was to have it in a cold bottled form. I'd buy the biggest case of water bottles that I could and store ALL of them on one shelf in my frig. (Told you...obessive/compulsive :P) But then I found myself gradually moving out of that phase. I'd end up finding five million half empty (or half full) bottles laying all over the place. It was gross. I had no idea how old the water was from one bottle to the next. They'd all end up filling the dogs' water dish. Then I realized "The dogs are drinking more bottled water than I am!" Well now I've discovered something new that is working obscenely well for me. Its weird. I can effortlessly drink almost all of my 64 ounces of water as long as it comes in a glass. Not just any glass though, a Coca-Cola glass I got for free at McDonald's. Huh? It holds the same amount of water at the bottle, or as the other kind of glass sitting right next to it on the shelf. But for some reason, that Coca-Cola glass manages to get me to drink may daily amount of water without any complaint. I don't get it, but I'm accepting it.

2. I've started back on my Trim Spa. Its that supplement that Anna Nicole Smith took and lost all that weight, and then there was a big scandal because they found out she didn't really take it, and then she died (not from the Trim Spa, silly!), and then Trim Spa got sued for false advertising, and then they were forced to pay everyone who bought some an amount of money, and I got a check for like $6. But guess what? I never cashed that check. Wanna know why? Because Trim Spa worked for me! Yup! Remember back in my first post when I turned 25 and my metabolism turned on me like an evil twin, and I exploded? Trim Spa, and a good diet, and some reasonable exercise, and 3 months later, I was 30 POUNDS lighter! You can't just take the pills and lay on the couch and wait to get skinny, which is what I think people did. It didn't work, they got bitter, and did what most bitter people do...blame some one else and sue the living crap out of them. But it worked for me, and I'm hoping it'll work again. I just need to remember to take it three times a day! Here's even an interesting article I found!

3. I have rediscovered my loving for kickboxing. Basically, I have rediscovered my love for throwing punches and kicks in time to fast music. Around the time I started losing the weight last time, I had the Kindergarten Class from Hell. Don't get me wrong, we did just fine that year, and by the end of the year we all still had love for each other. But almost everyday, it was a test of my patience and devotion to teaching. Thankfully, my husband bought one of the coolest things for my birthday...a punching bag. A real one, one that hung from the beams in the ceiling and needed boxing gloves to use. I made a CD of what I called my "angry music" to listen to. To most people, angry music might be by the band Korn or Tool. My angry music was "Hit Em High" from the Space Jam soundtrack or "Humans Being" by Van Halen from the Twister soundtrack. Might be a little soft for some, but it pumped me up, errrr! Everyday, after school, I'd come home, turn on my "angry music" (errr!) and beat the leaving crap out of that punching bag. It saved the children from reintroducing capital punishment in schools, and save me a trip to jail. This time around, I discovered some kickboxing videos on Netflix and as I did one this morning, it occurred to me, "Oh yeah! I do like throwing punches! I do like kicking into the air and pretending someone was standing there!" So now I'm on a mission to Netflix every kick boxing video I can find!

Told you...random thoughts. Here's another one...I wonder how much I'll weigh tomorrow morning?

So much for that...

I was feeling pretty good about myself this week. Drank my 64 ounces of water for a few days in a row, ate lots of veggies, very little carbs, lost some pounds. So I rewarded myself last night and tonight with some fruit drizzled in chocolate. Then I saw this...




















That would be crazy "Octomom" with a stomach flatter than mine. I've had one kid, she's had 14. Thaaaaaaaat's just greeeattt! Excuse me while I go binge on some fudge now.

Empowered

I'm feeling rather empowered today. I feel good about being able to get up and exercise this morning. I feel good about the food I've put in my body today. (I WALKED AWAY FROM THE NUTTERBUTTERS! WOO HOO!) I feel good about the weight I've lost (3.5 lbs) and that I'm geting closer to that 5 pound reward. I feel good about ordering my Trim Spa at a REALLY good discount. (I know I promised a post about that stuff, another time). Things are starting to click, a schedule is starting to work. I'm feeling good, feeling empowered!

My day...

• I actually lost a pound since yesterday :)
• Nutterbutters are of the devil :(
• I ate a large salad for lunch :)
• I had no fruit or veggie at dinner :(
• I drank 64 ounces of water :)

I lost it! I lost it!

OK, despite my MickeyD's mishap, I still lost a little poundage! Knowing my luck, it'll go back up in 3 minutes, but I'm writing it down right now! Woo Hoo!

I fell off the wagon...

Sometimes I wonder what is wrong with my brain. I literally seem to only be able to focus on one thing at a time. I can only focus on being a good mom, or I can only focus on exercising, or I can only focus on repainting my kitchen cabinets. That's what happened this week. I was repainting my cabinets and had no kitchen so that meant eating out three meals a day! The first day I did good driving by the McDonald's next to the hardware store, but 2 days in a row was just too much. But thinking back on it, I did better than a normal MickeyD's meal of bacon and egg biscuit, hash browns, and an OJ. I had a yogurt parfait and part of Wyatt's biscuit sandwich. Still, I was disappointed in myself. I was hoping to post my weigh in weight every Monday, but I'm not so sure there will be enough of a change, which might frustrate me. We'll see though. I'll do my best to start over tomorrow!

I did really good!

This is what I want to look like when I jog.

This is what I feel like when I jog.

Today was a very good day! Jogged most of my route. That hill in the park that leads up to Pueblo Vista is going to kill me. 2 dogs and a jogging stroller, oye! My thighs were screaming out in agony today. I love my park! I've been walking there almost every morning (Thank you Duke and Da Vinci) that I see the same people just about everyday. It was good to have witnesses to my jogging! At least someone knew I was doing it! I even bought a new exercise outfit from the clearance rack at Target to keep me motivated. I figure if I look like a hot and fit jogger, then I'll become one eventually.

I got a real bad case of the munchies this afternoon but I fought it off with Crystal Light and some sugar-free gum. I even had a salad for lunch and elk burgers, a salad, and sauteed mushrooms for dinner. I met my 5+ Veggies and fruit for the day! That one and 64 oz. of water seemed to be the hard goals for me to meet everyday, but I'm trying. I'm going to bed early. For the next 2 days, I'll be tackling re-painting my kitchen cabinets. How many calories will that burn?

REWARDS!

You might have noticed that I plan to reward myself every time I lose a certain amount of weight, but I'm having trouble thinking of some rewards that aren't food based, or centered around scrapbooking. (Can you see what my world usually revolves around?) Leave me a comment of what you would like as a reward. I need some new ideas.

For the record...

160.5 lbs, didn't drink enough water, but did eat my 5+ fruits and veggies AND jogged most of my route today, was able to take a quick nap this afternoon and play with Wyatt's friends (and mommies) in the neighborhood. I'm doing my best to stay active.

Oye! What the Freak Happened?

When I started my pre-teens, my face, my thighs, and my bum chubbed out like Violet Beauregaurde, the gum chewing chick from Willy Wonka. And as any good, supportive father would, my father nicked named me "Big Bum Som." That's right. I have been "Big Bum Som" ever since. I was not obese by any means, but I always had some chub to me. I slimmed down in the last part of high school and during college. During this time, I started walking everyday. I started creating an easy habit of simple daily exercise, and though I was never super skinny, I could eat my reasonable snacks, or raid my chocolate stash, and not blow up like a balloon. Then I turned 25 and my metabolism crashed! Before I knew it, I had gone from 135 pounds to 162 pounds. Then Byron surprised me one Xmas with a Caribbean cruise in March. Say what???? You want me to walk around a boat feeling like a pig! No Way! I knew I needed to do something. So I ordered some Trim Spa (another post), started jogging instead of walking, took an extra 10 minutes to do another form of exercise, drank a ton of water, and STOPPED snacking all together. I lost 30 pounds in 3 months, and was a slim and fit little thing in time for my cruise. I felt great. I was paid compliments. I got to go shopping for my new clothes! Lots of fun!

Well, time went by. Fertility treatments began. I'm trying to be careful not to blame my weight gain on my fertility treatments, but when you are in the middle of that crap, sleep is more important than waking up at 5 AM to run, and finding comfort in a creamy dark chocolate candy bar after a progesterone in oil injection was more important than skipping that 3:30 PM snack. Well, thankfully, I became pregnant with my sweet wonderful boy Wyatt. And we all know how that pregnancy went. Nothing like creating a habit of laziness by being put on 2 months of mandatory bed rest! Surprisingly enough, I lost most of the weight after having Wyatt. I slimmed down to 133 pounds and was feeling pretty good about myself. Guess that terrible stomach flu 2 weeks after Wyatt was born was good for something! ;)

Lets move on to present day. I'm pushing 160 again. Why? I've got some thoughts. Becoming a stay at home mom with a frig to look at everyday. Eating chicken nuggets for lunch because why in the world would I make 2 separate lunches? A failed fertility treatment, not to mention 5 shots of more progesterone in oil for absolutely no reason. Being pulled in every direction for church and family obligations, so that there leaves no time for working out. And how about the big reason, I just plan don't care! :P

Problem is, I'm not comfortable in my own skin right now. The rolls of fat on my back make it uncomfortable to sit. I can feel the fat in my chubby cheeks every time I wash my face. My jackets don't fit around my arms, and I have to do that squat move after I put on my jeans to stretch out the thigh section! Its time to do something about it! Its time to lose some weight.

My goal for this blog is to journal the process. Its hard for me to see any change, especially when the scale stays the same, or worse, the number gets bigger. One post might be a rant about how hungry I am. Another might just be what my scale said that morning. I might blog about the extra 5 minutes I jogged. Or I might post about how I fell off the carb wagon. I will post goals and create time lines. I will feel comfortable in my skin again.