Defeated

How is it that I'm sick for 2 days and I gained half my weight back that I lost? Are you kidding me? I just want to cry. I didn't pig out, at least I don't think I did. I ate a few more things than I normally would have. Is that my life? Is my nutrition going to be such an overwhelming factor for the rest of my life? If I slip slightly for one or two days, will that ruin a month's worth of hard work? I'm tired, I'm sad, and I feel so defeated. I will try my best to watch my eating today, but I'm having a hard time finding the desire to care. And now I'm just pissed off at myself for being such a drama queen!