Defeated

How is it that I'm sick for 2 days and I gained half my weight back that I lost? Are you kidding me? I just want to cry. I didn't pig out, at least I don't think I did. I ate a few more things than I normally would have. Is that my life? Is my nutrition going to be such an overwhelming factor for the rest of my life? If I slip slightly for one or two days, will that ruin a month's worth of hard work? I'm tired, I'm sad, and I feel so defeated. I will try my best to watch my eating today, but I'm having a hard time finding the desire to care. And now I'm just pissed off at myself for being such a drama queen!

Blech!

I think I'm getting sick. I was inexplicably tired and slothful at the start of this week, it was that time of the month, and I just wasn't feeling good. And then last night the tickle in the throat came. Lovely. I'm frustrated. My brain is telling me I should be working out (I did jog), but my body isn't even responding. I just found this article telling me to lay off the work out for a bit, so I'm going to take that advice. What's the rule of thumb for eating when your sick? That's a huge problem for me. Because if I'm resting, I like to snack. Or if I'm sick, I like to snack. Or if I'm...well, you get the idea. I like to snack. I guess this week will be one of those "No Progress" kinds of weeks. I'll try to have self-control with the snacking, and just start all over next Monday!

I just made this picture my desktop background to remind me what my reward will be for losing 30 pounds. Maybe that will keep the Valentine's chocolates out of my big mouth!

Worn Out

I used to have new jeans as my 15 pound reward, but my big ol' bum has worn a hole into the seat of one pair of jeans, and my big ol' thighs wore a whole into my other pair of jeans. I'm gonna need those new jeans a little bit sooner than planned.

I Want Judy Garland's Legs

Thank You Ladies!

• to Pat my neighbor, who knows I've been trying to jog in the park, rather than walk. You started cheering me on as I walked by you, and encouraged me to "Get Runnin'!"



• to the absolute stranger in the park, who not only noticed I was jogging, but noticed me schlepping a stroller with a 40 pound, soon to be 4 year old, and 2 large dogs. She yelled, "YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION!" to me as I ran past. Me, an inspiration? Wow.



• to a true inspiration, my neighbor Terri, a freakin' TRI-ATHLETE, for crying out loud, who made me feel awesome for running my pathetic 20 little minutes, and reassured me I can walk every 1 minute for every 3 minutes I run. Thank the Lord above!



• and though this one might not seem fitness related, to my friend Kristi, who felt impressed to send a little message telling me I was "cute and adorable." Those words just lightened my steps a bit, so that I can keep on going!

I'm feeling blessed today because of you, ladies!

Red Glitter Toes

I worked for a month to lose 5 pounds, just so I get could my reward, a blessed pedicure. I sacrificed carbs, jogged until my cheeks were tomato red, and drank water until I thought might float away. The day finally came. I went to my local Korean sweatshop...oops, I mean, my local nail salon, and had a lovely quiet hour to myself. A man did my feet, which made me uncomfortable at first, but then he started a reflexology massage on my feet and calves. Any awkwardness went right out the window as I closed my eyes and tried not to make inappropriate noises. It was the most lovely experience! I chose blingy red glitter nail polish! In the sun it looked like I had rubies on my toes. Then, within an hour of getting home, Wyatt stepped on my big left toe, and I now have a rough impression of his Vans imitations in my red glitter paint. Maybe a small thing, and yet, I want to cry. Or maybe I want to cry because I'm so hungry. I have decided yet.